Smell of Ash and Memories
by Wolfing Pups
Summary: After his escape from Azkaban, Sirius goes on a hunt. T for cursing.


**Title: **Smell of Ash and Memories  
**Author: **Kane

**Rating: **G

**Summary: **After his escape from Azkaban, Sirius goes on a hunt.

* * *

He kept running. 

He had no idea where he was going, or what he should look for. He just knew what he hoped to find when he got there. _I can't stop_, he told himself, his four feet hitting the grass, sand, pavement, or whatever happened to be below him at any given moment. _Not now_. He swore to himself before he made his way into freedom that he wouldn't stop until he found one of two things: the man, or the boy.

_No,_ he corrected himself. _The coward or the boy._

In a few days, Sirius Black found a place he recognized. It was a small neighborhood tucked away in the land of magic. He strutted down the sidewalk with the urge to race the lone bird that flew overhead. But he was too tired. He had to stay alert and hold on to what little energy he had left that late night, because he was so close. He was so close to finding the only place that meant anything to him. After only a few minutes of walking, he found it.

There was no home there anymore. He stared at the open lot that had never grown a new home for a new family. He was glad to see they hadn't written over history. He decided that he wasn't too suprised by this: it was, after all, where the Dark Lord finally fell. Where his friends fell.

Sirius sniffed the ground. Padfoot's nose could easily pick up the smell of ash and memories. He felt old and sad as he breathed the past into his lungs. James and Lily Potter died here. Harry Potter lived here. Voldemort disappeared here.

Snap. He transformed back into the man that allowed all of it to happen. Now that he had escaped Azkaban, he could engulf himself in guilt. He refused to let the guilt take over before, not with the Dementors there. But now, twelve years later and tired as fuck, Sirius allowed himself to cry and feel guilty.

He pucked a yellow dandelion from the ground. He twirled the stem in his fingers and let out a loud sob. _James and Lily made you_, he thought to the weed. _You'd better be damn greatful._

Desperate for anything more comforting than the weed, Sirius looked up with blurred vision and searched for something to soothe him. He stood and made his way to a tree on the far side of the yard. _Harry's swing_, he smiled, and he let out a thankful laugh.

Harry's swing that Sirius and Remus had magiked together still gripped the tree's branch. Sirius pushed it and watched it sway, the seat empty, save for a few bird droppings and fallen leaves.

_You shouldn't have stopped_, his mind growled. _Look at you. Emotional over a swing when you should be finding Harry. Idiot._

Running a hand through his tangled hair, Sirius whispered a goodbye to the vacant lot and became Padfoot again. His search wasn't over.

He really was more clever than he realised. At first, he was not happy when a little witch found him and dragged him home with her. Neither were her parents. He didn't run away, though, because he was given water and food. And while they slept, he transformed out of his dog form and at _real_ food. He was extremely thankful that Mrs. Smethwyk always kept her leftovers, and never seemed to miss them when they couldn't be found the next morning. He also heard updates on his own escape, so he learned what areas to avoid and what times of day would be safest for him.

He was also extremely thankful that Mr. Smethwyk was a heavy reader. Piles of books and endless shelves covered the small house. The idea that he could find information about his godson in one of those books would have seemed ridiculous, had he not heard Mr. Smethwyk tell his daughter the story one night.

"And You-Know-Who just _died?_"

"Yes." Mr. Smethwyk closed the book and put in on the table next to his daughter's bed. "Tomorrow I'll tell you about Grindelwald."

"And Harry Potter _lived?_"

"Yes."

Little Laura was silent for a moment. Sirius curled next to the bed, listening intently.

"Daddy? If Harry's mommy and daddy died, what happened to him?"

Sirius's ears perked up.

Mr. Smethwyk frowned. "As far as I know, he went with his Muggle aunt and uncle."

"Muggle!"

"Yes."

"But...oh, daddy, that can't be right!"

"As far as I know, dear. Now come on. It's late. It's time for bed." He tucked the covers around her once more and kissed her forehead and whipered goodnight. He then patted Sirius. "Night, mutt," he yawned.

Laura pouted. "Daddy, his name is Snuffles."

Sirius felt awful for leaving that night. But with this new information, he knew just where to look for Harry. He remembered Lily complaining about her sister one night. Lily wanted desperately to meet her new nephew, and for Petunia to meet Harry, but Petunia had downright refused. Sirius asked where this sister of hers was located.

"Little Whinging, Surrey," she replied, exhasperated. "Why?"

"I'll go set her straight. It's about damn time we do something about her attitude towards you."

Lily had scoffed, and that information had been thrown to the back of his mind, nearly forgotten. But now, as he ran faster and faster towards Surrey, every forgotten memory came racing back, flooding his mind with thoughts he had forgotten entirely. His mind ignored the houses that were flying past him, or that he had, indeed, reached a quaint neighborhood in the heart of Little Whinging.

He came to a sudden halt, his head whirling. It wasn't possible. There was no possible way! He cursed his dog eyes and moved closer, just a tad. Sirius would have sworn he was staring at James. And that could only mean he had found--

"_Lumos._"

The boy, who looked about thirteen or so, was obviously a wizard. If Sirius wasn't so stunned, he would have lept with joy. As the boy moved his light-tipped wand above his head, Sirius saw the glasses and the hair, and the faint tracings of what appeared to be a scar...and Sirius' eyes widened.

It had to be. It _had_ to be Harry. It was too coincidental for there to be any other possibility. Sirius wanted to run up and lick Harry's face, and scream, "I'm your ruddy godfather, give me a bloody hug!" but he knew better. He'd gone this long without losing control. He could go a bit longer.

When Harry suddenly took a step back and tripped over his trunk, Sirius felt like running up to him to make sure he wasn't hurt. He had a vague memory of babysitting Harry one night, and Harry bumping his head and crying like the sky was falling down around him. Sirius had held him and kissed his bump, and decided it was time to call Remus for backup.

He remembered then how much he missed being a godfather.

A tremendous BANG pulled Sirius out his memories, and he found himself looking at the Knight Bus. He frowned to himself--where did Harry think he was going?--and realised the chase had not ended, not yet.

He had to keep running.


End file.
